TK: To-Go Breakfast Bars

I am one of those people who absolutely cannot skip breakfast. I have to have my 3 square meals a day or I will starve. The only problem with this is that my little family does not get out of bed until 8 am at the earliest, leaving me no time to make breakfast before we have to leave the house. (I understand the obvious answer here is to get up earlier...but abso-fucking-lutely not.) I usually make breakfast when I get to work, which is doable with my job, but I much prefer to just grab something quick. I flipped through Thug Kitchen and found this recipe for breakfast bars and thought maybe they're on to something here.

The fun part about these bars is that you can basically put whatever you want in them. Unfortunately for me, I did not have any dried cranberries (they suggested throwing some in there) and I think they would have really made a difference here. I did have dried banana chips and smashed those up in there, but they are missing something and I think that "thing" is flavor.

Mix, toast, stir and add and you press it all into a parchment lined 13x9. (The parchment lining is very necessary)

Then you toss it in the oven for about 25-30 and let it cool. Once you do that, put it in the fridge to harden even more then lift the parchment paper out of the dish and cut into squares (about 10).

The color is really lacking here and I don't like it

These are, as promised, an easy way to get in a quick breakfast that isn't drowning in sugar and fat. Again, my only issue is the lack of flavor and that's completely my fault. I encourage you to try it and add in what you like.

Recipe:

2 cups rolled oats

3/4 cup uncooked quinoa

1/4 uncooked millet

1 1/4 cups chopped mixed nuts or seeds (I used almonds and sunflower seeds)

1/2 cup dried cranberries or other dried fruit (I used banana chips)

1/4 tsp salt

1/2 cup maple syrup (I used a combo of syrup and honey)

1/2 cup peanut butter

1/4 cup coconut or olive oil (I used coconut)

2 tbs sugar (I used brown sugar)

1 tsp vanilla extract

Preheat oven to 350. Line a 13x9 with parchment paper. 

Heat a dry skillet over medium low heat and add the oats, quinoa and millet. Stir them around until toasty.

One that is done, toss the oat mixture with your nuts and dried fruit.

In a small saucepan, combine the syrup, peanut butter, oil, sugar and vanilla until warm and melted. 

Add the syrup mix to the oat mix and combine. 

Pour the mixture into a baking dish and spread around until even. Then make sure you pack it down really well. 

Toss it in the oven for 25-30, let completely cool then throw it in the fridge until cold. Cut into bars and keep in the fridge in an airtight container. 

SS: Tex-Mex Casserole

The other night I went to a charity event with my mother and my sister as a last minute thing. I already had dinner planned out and figured I might as well still make it since, well, the kids still had to eat. I got lucky in that this was quick and simple and, in true casserole form, took most of the time in the oven. Yay!

I love casserole dishes with pasta because the kids would eat pasta every day if I decided it should be so. It makes for a sure fire, no fuss meal every single time and God how I wish I lived in Italy. I feel like I would just fit in so well there. I mean, I could eat pasta and bread every day and then walk everywhere. (By the way, if that's not what it's really like - don't tell me. I need it to be that way.)

See the corn? I'm positive that's what makes it Tex-Mex.

Anyway, here's the recipe:

8 oz. whole wheat pasta

1 lb lean ground beef

1 small onion, diced

1 tsp. minced garlic

1 (10.5 oz) can tomato soup

1 (15 oz) can black beans, drained and rinsed

1 (15.5 oz) can corn, drained

1 (10 oz) can Ro*Tel (not drained)

1 (4.5 oz) can chopped green chilies (not drained)

2 tsp. chili powder

1 1/2 tsp. ground cumin

1/2 tsp. salt

1/2 tsp. pepper

1/2 cup shredded cheese (mexican blend, I was out so I used parmesan and mozzarella. whatevs)

1 diced tomato, for topping

Preheat the oven to 350. Coat a 9 x 13 with cooking spray

Cook the pasta. Drain and set aside.

Cook the beef, onion and garlic until the beef is done. Drain any excess fat and return to the skillet.

Add everything but the cheese to the skillet and mix together.

Transfer the mixture from the skillet to the 9 x 13. Sprinkle the cheese on top. 

Bake about 20 minutes, until hot and the cheese is melted. Top with diced tomato.

This was pretty damn good. I'll file this under "Kids will eat" and call it a day.

Creamy Potato Salad with Bacon & Roasted Mushrooms with an appearance by ST: Homemade BBQ Sauce

First, I'd like to clarify that there are 2 recipes here. No, there are no roasted mushrooms in the potato salad...although...I might dig that.

These two were my sides to go along with spontaneous brisket night from my earlier post. I was pretty excited about this potato salad because it makes a lot and I've been waiting for an occasion such as this so I could try it. I'm just going to come out and say that this did not disappoint. People ate this up like it was the ticket to everlasting youth. I got so many compliments on this and I don't know what it is that makes it so much different than any other potato salad out there. Collin swears it's the green onions, others swear the bacon makes all the difference, but whatever it is just know that it works.

I got one photo. One. 

Next up were the roasted mushrooms. This recipe calls for 1 lb white mushrooms and 1 lb cremini mushrooms. Now, I don't have any idea what a cremini mushroom is and I couldn't find them at the store, so I got 2 lbs of white mushrooms and called it a day. Spoiler alert: it made absolutely no difference. You want to know what does make a difference though? The fresh Thyme. Sometimes you can get away with the dried stuff, but trust me - you need fresh here. I wanted to eat the entire pan myself. My mouth is watering just thinking about it, actually. I'll give you this recipe, because it's easy and you need to try them:

Yummerz.

Recipe: 1 stick unsalted butter, melted, 1/2 cup extra virgin olive oil, 2 tbs. minced garlic, 2 tbs. chopped fresh Thyme, 2 tsp. kosher salt, 1 tsp. pepper, 1 lb white mushrooms, 1 lb cremini mushrooms. Preheat the oven to 425. In a large bowl, combine the melted butter, oil, garlic, thyme, salt and pepper. Add the mushrooms and toss to coat. Spread them onto a rimmed baking sheet and roast, shaking occasionally (I forgot to do this part) for about 30-45 minutes until juicy and slightly shriveled. Bam. Done. Feast.

A close up of all their glory.

So you know how I mentioned before that planning things is my verb? Yeah? Now do you remember when I mentioned how a random crisis can really put me in a good mood? Well, in strolled the crisis right as the brisket was being cut: I forgot to buy barbecue sauce. 

Yes I, the planner of all things to be planned, forgot to buy the most crucial part of a barbecue. But did I let this small hiccup ruin things? Did I fall prey to the ridicule that floated my way? Ha! I threw my head back and laughed, because I knew I had seen a homemade barbecue sauce recipe in the newest addition to my cookbooks. Ten minutes later, we had hot barbecue sauce simmering on the stove and the evening was saved! That was also right around the time I almost gave peanut butter to my friend's son, who is highly allergic, but luckily I remembered in time and all was well. Just a reminder that no one is perfect, not even me. *sigh* 

*in a deep voice with a slight accent* BBQ SAUCE

Here is the recipe in case you're ever in a bind: 

1 (8 oz) can tomato sauce

1/2 cup apple cider vinegar (I probably only had a little more than 1/4 cup left in the bottle)

1/4 cup tomato paste (I did not have this and used ketchup instead)

1/4 cup honey

3 tbs. molasses (thanks to my Grandma's crinkle cookies I always have a jar on hand <3)

2 tsp. liquid hickory smoke (I did not have this, or anything like it, so I omitted it)

1/2 tsp kosher salt

1/2 tsp smoked paprika

1/4 tsp garlic powder

1/4 tsp onion powder (I was out of this, but did have dried chopped onions and I tossed some in)

1/8 tsp ground cinnamon

1/8 tsp chili powder

Combine everything in a saucepan, bring to a boil and let it simmer until slightly thickened, stirring occasionally. It will keep in an airtight container in the refrigerator for up to one month. 

Now, I tweaked this to the taste of my company so feel free to do the same. All in all, it was a hit, people loved it, and my crisis itch has been scratched for another day. 

TK: Creamy Black Bean and Cilantro Dip and Pineapple Guacamole

Because Collin keeps a strange work schedule, I meal plan on Wednesdays instead of Sunday like normal people. So when Sunday evening rolled around (and I'm already in bed) and Collin announced that he wanted to smoke a brisket on Tuesday and have people over that evening I literally had to shove my entire meal plan aside and figure out what I was going to prepare last minute for company. Lucky for me, I love this kind of shit. Last minute planning is my favorite - and I'm really not kidding. I'm a planner. It's what I do, and if I'm being honest, I'm pretty damn good at it. As a matter of fact, if you really wanna get my motor going, throw in a crisis during a last minute event that I'm planning and watch me handle that shit. *sigh* It has been too long.

Anyway, before I get way too turned on, I decided on a medley of things from Thug Kitchen and Cravings. I did toss together a double batch of Chrissy's Secretly Spicy Deviled Eggs, but I won't post about those because I already have. Of course, those were popular AF and were the second things to go. Yes, they were second. To what, you ask? Read on:

The one thing that got the most raves was, shockingly enough, the Creamy Black Bean and Cilantro Dip from Thug Kitchen. I'm not kidding. Everyone commented on how good this was. My sister even liked this and she really can't stand cilantro. It's such a breeze to make, too. You throw a bunch of stuff in a food processor and it blends so beautifully and the flavors mingle so evenly that it really just tastes like bean dip from heaven:

Here is a close up. Now I know why the book didn't boast a picture.

Recipe: 2 1/2 cups cooked black beans (or 1 2/3 cans black beans, which is what I did), 1/3 cup veggie broth or water (I used veggie broth), 2 cloves garlic, juice of 1 lime, pinch of salt, 1/2 tsp chili powder, 1/4 cup chopped cilantro, 1/2 cup chopped green onions. Throw it all in a food processor and go to town.

I decided to make 2 dips from Thug Kitchen, and I'm glad I did because the brisket took way longer than we thought and people were very snackish. The next dip I made was called Pineapple Guacamole. I felt I used too much pineapple as I did not measure anything out and eyeballed it all. I was in a serious rush and short on time so next time I'll remember to measure out the pineapple. However, this went just as quickly as the bean dip - if not quicker:

Dip is hard.

Recipe: 2 avocados, 2/3 cup chopped pineapple (I used canned), 1/2 cup chopped red onion, 2 tbs. cilantro, 2 cloves minced garlic, grated zest of 1/2 lime, 1 tbs. lime juice, 1/8 tsp. ground cumin, pinch of salt. I actually didn't mince or chop anything and threw it all in the food processor (except the avocado) until smooth-ish. I mashed the avocado in a bowl with a fork and added the rest of the ingredients until mixed. Delish.

Side by Side

So basically, if you want to impress anyone - anyone at all - you need these. Someone call the Queen of England and tell her I've got her next dip recipes for high tea. Wait - do they have dip at high tea? Someone get the Queen on the phone, I've got a game changer here.

Skinny Taste: Fast and Slow

I've been on vacation (I think I've mentioned that) and tomorrow I go back for my first whole week at work. Throughout this little break I have done nothing but eat what I want, when I want, and I haven't worked out in weeks. This has resulted in some very obvious poundage (on top of the extra poundage I had accrued since I stopped working out) and I know it's time for me to scale back and get my life back together. This also means I need to get back on seriously meal planning instead of ordering take-out from menus that were placed on my doorknob. I've also been flipping the pages of my cookbooks looking for something easy and appetizing to kick back into gear and it's just so hard. Then I  remembered scrolling through Instagram a while back and screenshotting a cookbook I wanted to try:

Voila! 

This cookbook features recipes that are 30 minutes as well as recipes for the slow cooker and *drum roll* they are all healthy! This is the answer to my lazy girl problems. I often flip through these books and wonder if I'll ever gather enough motivation to spark my own originality when I cook again. Eh, who cares. I did that shit up until now. My mind needs a break. 

This book is nifty. She adds in a little key chart:

SO convenient!

I love this. This makes my life even easier. By the way, if you're reading this and you buy me things - I want a pressure cooker/instant pot. 

And she adds the keys to the contents page of each chapter. LOVE.

Anyway, the whole point of this post is to let you know that I'm adding a new book to my rotation.

OH. I've been asked this a few times. Because I cook from a few different books, I put an abbreviation before the recipe name so you know which book it's from: 

TK - Thug Kitchen

SS - Skinny Suppers

ST - Skinny Taste

And if there is no tag before the name then it is from Cravings. :D

Pineapple-Grilled Short Ribs with Sweet and Salty Coconut Rice

I have never found it necessary to purchase short ribs. I have never, to my knowledge, eaten short ribs and I probably could have gone my entire life without ever tasting them (and being quite OK with it). That being said, I had no idea what a flanken short rib was and really had no idea what they looked like. Thankfully, the Kroger I went to had ONE package of short ribs that actually said "flanken short rib" on it and it was the amount I needed. It was fate - except really. 

She suggests a 12-24 hour marination period and after last night's extra crispy almost-disaster, I did just that. As a matter of fact, as soon as I wrapped up blogging last night I got to work on these bad boys. Because marinating is literally letting meat soak in various spices and liquids, there is really nothing to elaborate on there and I'll move on to more important things.

Marination Station

Important things like, for example, the sweet and salty coconut rice. Do ya'll remember way back when I started this blog and I said that I absolutely had to make the recipe as-is? Well, I'm sure ya'll have figured out by now that I really can't be trusted because I fucked up again today by not double checking that I had all the ingredients. Can you believe I ran out of sugar? SUGAR. I had everything else: jasmine rice, salt, coconut milk, coconut flakes but not a spoonful of granulated sugar was to be found in my pantry. I then remembered putting sugar on my whiteboard grocery list outside my pantry door, but this did not change the fact that today I was sugar-less. Lucky for me, she does not specify what kind of sugar you need for this. It simply says "sugar" and nothing else. So, I am NOT cheating when I say that I used dark brown sugar (because, what do you know, I was also out of light brown sugar). Hashtag winning.

Oh, here is where I should also probably mention that I have never made a pot of rice (that wasn't instant) that came out edible. I swear I have cooked before and I am good at 95% of it, but rice is my nemesis. It's like it can smell the fear as I'm following the directions to the letter. Every. Time. Once, I attempted a pot of brown rice and it came out so crunchy I wondered if I had blacked out at some point and forgot to add water. That one still remains a mystery, actually. 

So now that you know my history, understand that I was very nervous while making this and checked, doubled checked, and checked again to make sure that I was doing this correctly. When all was said and done and the lid came off the pot it looked...creamy. But not bad. It did not "fluff", but after a good stir and a little taste I was certain that this was the end of my rice-fuck-up streak. Guys, this was amazing. AMAZING. And that was with dark brown sugar. I can only imagine how good this would taste using granulated sugar. I wasn't even mad that Collin was taking forever getting the grill ready because it gave me more time to eat this. 

Kind of looks like oatmeal.

And because I'm so thrilled this didn't come out crunchy:

There's one with the book.

As you can see, this looks a bit like oatmeal and/or brown rice because of my sugar choice, but fear not. It is as delicious as you hope it will be. 

So once the grill was finally ready, I forced Collin to read the recipe to make sure these were done right because the man has never met a rib that cooked in under 8 hours. However, he did as he was told and a few minutes later we had dinner:

Yeah I gnawed on it a little before I realized I should probably take a picture.

To summarize: these two were fantastic. Collin asked me to keep the marinade recipe and we chowed down. This is one of the most satisfying meals I have had in a while so do yourself a favor and treat yo-self.

"Everything" Chicken Sandwich Melts

This is one of those recipes that takes up more than one page, which means I was very reluctant to make it <--- that's the lazy girl in me. It doesn't matter that this looks amazing and every time I flip through to make something I think to myself "Why haven't I made that?" and then I remember it's because the ingredient list consists of 20 different items (yes, I counted). However, I am on vacation and decided there really wasn't a better time because I pretty much have nothing but time.

I should probably mention that the 20 different items are made up of mostly spices, making this much less complicated than I lead on. Basically, you toss some spices together in a few different bowls, coat the chicken, and fry away. It's really not that hard.

That being said, I have mentioned on more than one occasion that I do not...and I mean I do not, have any luck with frying meats. I tried to blame it on Chrissy at first, but if I'm being honest with myself I have to realize that this all can't be a strange coincidence. The failed fried meats all have one thing in common: Me. (Well... and this cookbook, but I'm looking past that). I will say that this is the first time I did not follow the recipe to the "T" in that I thought I had canola oil on hand, but I was mistaken. Because I did not realize this until the chicken was already coated, I substituted with what I did have...which was vegetable oil.

Now, I remember reading somewhere a while ago that different oils have differences when heated...something about how you should use this oil for that, etc. and there is a legitimate reason for it...OK maybe I don't remember exactly what it said, but it doesn't change the fact that I was aware that something could go wrong by switching up the frying oil. Are you sensing some foreshadowing here, because I'm laying it on pretty thick.

So I filled my pan with the oil and turned it onto medium heat as instructed. The moment I put the chicken in I knew it was over. They browned immediately. And then they got darker and darker very quickly, but I was determined to leave them in for the specified 2 minutes. When I took them out the breading was burned, obviously. The skeptic in me also just had to know if 2 minutes was enough time to cook them through, so I cut one open and it was perfect. Perfect. If it weren't for the burnt coating I would have nailed it.

This is about the time that Collin decided to waltz in and check things out, by they way. He actually told me to cut him off a little piece to see if it was still good and if you haven't noticed by now, Collin is a picky eater so this surprised me. I was even more surprised when he said it was good. Yes, you read that correctly.

Anyway, I turned the heat down to medium and tossed in the other two chicken breasts and they turned out a little less burnt...but not by much:

I ran out of tomato and cheese so the back one on the right is a little sad. Burnt and sad.

These just look hilarious. Here's a close up of one on my white plate.

No, that's not a burger. There is chicken under there.

And despite the singed outer layer, the perfectly cooked chicken underneath:

It makes no sense.

As far as taste goes, these were a bit too spicy to give to the kids so they had something else, but these were pretty good. I did dip mine in ketchup - it was pretty good that way actually - and Collin ate TWO of these. He even ate the tomato and I really thought he would pick it off because he doesn't particularly like tomato. 

What a strange dinner. 

TK: Whole Wheat Banana Pancakes

Today is Easter! Calvin gets really excited about Easter because he is obsessed with egg hunts. Every year, the kids spend the night with the grandparents Saturday night and go to Easter service at church with them on Sunday. They don't get home until about 10:30, which gives me time to get everything set up, and this year I felt like making a cute little brunch.

So I fiddled around Pinterest for a few minutes and found cute little bunny butts made out of pancakes. I remembered that Thug Kitchen had a pancake recipe, and it's a good thing, because I didn't have any pre-made mix on hand. The recipe is simple and you always have the ingredients on hand. I whipped up a batch, divided it in two, and dyed them pink and blue. It was around this time that I realized I did not have any syrup. Obviously there is more than one way to eat a pancake and I was confident I could still make it work, so I decided to assemble the kid's bunnies peanut butter and jelly style. I stuck two pancake rounds together with peanut butter and jelly and assembled the rest with dabs of peanut butter here and there. They did not turn out as cute as I had hoped, but oh well:

I used a smashed tator tot for the tail since I didn't have whipped cream.

You also can't really tell that they're dyed until you bite into them. Lesson learned. 

Now for the really fun part of being a mom. I had to threaten Calvin to eat them, Andrew ate everything but the pancake and eggs...so basically just banana and raisins. And then. My husband, after witnessing all of this, tells me he won't be eating any pancakes because we don't have any syrup. 

At this point, I smacked my knife on the counter out of frustration and told him he'd better suck it up and figure it out because now I was extremely annoyed. He did take pancakes, and I really have no idea how he ate them - nor do I care. I, however, smeared peanut butter on mine and topped it with sliced bananas like a normal, problem solving fucking person and it was delicious.

Here is the pancake recipe:

2 1/2 cups whole wheat flour (I used regular white because I'm sick of whole wheat)

2 tbs. brown or white sugar (I used brown)

2 tsp. baking soda

1/2 tsp. salt

2 cups milk

And if you want to make them banana, which I did not this time but I have before, mash 1 small banana.

Whisk together the dry ingredients, then add the wet. Do not mix too much or your pancakes will be tough.

VOILA! Happy Easter!

John's Marinated Steaks, John's Crispy Roasted Potatoes and IL Buco-Style Kale Salad

Today's post is a triple whammy. I realized two things while meal planning for this week: 1) I hadn't blogged in a bit and 2) I was short a meal for the week and was out of motivation. And that is how tonight's dinner was born. I skimmed through the book and found a nice medley of recipes that were sure to be winners. That being said, this will likely be a longer post than most - but I'll compensate with extra photos. I feel like everyone wins here. 

To start, me and the hubs had a little kid-free day and evening yesterday so we took that time to see a movie and do a little work around the house. You know, married people stuff. The evening ended with us jumping on the trampoline whilst drinking from a bottle of champagne and the hubs throwing up. 

So this morning when I realized I needed to marinate the steaks, I was simultaneously eating Chinese food to get my life right again. 

Fat steak in a little bowl

Because the bowl I chose was not quite big enough, I flipped the steaks after a few hours to ensure no steak was left out of being marinated. I'm fair like that. I feel like I should note here that this recipe is very easy to half. My small family can get by with 2 steaks instead of 4 - one for me and the boys and the other one for Collin because steak=manly. 

Once dinnertime rolled around, Collin was in charge of the grill while I tackled the potatoes and salad. I don't use the grill and have no desire to learn how, but I feel like I've touched on that before so I'll move on. 

The first thing I made were the croutons. Oh, man did those start out fun. I bought a nice, crusty bread maybe 5 days ago when I did my grocery shopping only to find that it had molded yesterday. I. Was. Pissed. I had to throw the entire thing away and made sure to curse the ever living shit out of Kroger in the process. To top it off, when we went to HEB to get the steaks I forgot to buy more bread. So today I guilted Collin in to going to the store to buy me more bread, which he did even though I could tell he absolutely did not want to. Once I had the bread, it was smooth sailing.

Good thing I made these first: I got to snack on them the whole time I was cooking.

This made an absurd amount of croutons. Way too much for the salad, unless you prefer your salad to be half salad, half croutons. Then this was probably perfect. They were delicious, though. However, since I am the only one who likes croutons in this freaking house I knew that the excess would likely be thrown away. It doesn't make any damn sense. Collin will eat toast, but doesn't like fucking croutons. I really just can't even get into that right now because I could go on forever. UGH.

The salad calls for Kale and you have to dunk it in boiling water for a few seconds before you submerge it in ice cold water. Then she stresses how important it is to dry the Kale as much as possible. So, I pulled out my trusty salad spinner and spun that Kale like you wouldn't believe. I spun at least 6 times and then put Collin on spinning duty for a while. I was so certain that this would be the driest Kale in all the land. HA. I could hear the Kale laughing at me while in the spinner because, although no more water was spinning out, the Kale was still very moist. Slick to the touch, even. I was baffled and didn't know if this was dry enough or if I should continue. I decided to blot with paper towels, just to be safe, and wouldn't you know - there was no water blotting onto the paper towels. What kind of game was Kale playing here? What kind of sorcery does this Kale entertain? Unimpressed, I decided that enough was enough and if the dressing didn't stick then so be it. 

 As you can see, it all worked out in the end. 

Now the first bite of this salad left my mouth puckered. The lemon flavor was entirely too strong and I had to choke back a cough. When paired with the croutons it tones down a bit, but if you're a crouton hater like my husband there's really nothing to be done. The leaves also feel a bit....thick...as you eat it. I can't describe it, but your teeth will have gotten a workout once you get through this salad. Here comes the strange part: I found myself unable to stop eating this. I would still tone down the lemon next time, but the tangy dressing paired with the garlicky croutons was irresistible.  

The potatoes required a bit more prep what with all the chopping and what not. She markets these potatoes as being crispy and I could not be more down with that if I tried. I love a nice, crispy hunk of potato. 

This photo is not at all relevant, but I thought it would make a cool picture so I took it.

Basically, you chop up a bunch of stuff and throw it in a bowl and when you're done it will look like this:

She has you pre-heat some oil in the oven and swears this is the secret to crispy potatoes every time. I get that. Oil crisps things. Makes sense. Either way, I couldn't wait to pop one of these in my mouth and hear the satisfying 'crunch' that only a crispy potato can provide. 

There they are. Browned and waiting.

I scaled the sheet and picked what looked to me to be the crispiest of them all and tossed it in my mouth...and was met with a soft potato. Soft. Not crispy. As a matter of fact, nothing about these were crispy. They were good, don't get me wrong. we enjoyed them and ate them up like nobody's business...but if you're going to market something as crispy and get my hopes up then you better damn deliver. To this day I have to say that the BEST crispy potatoes were made for me by my brother. It was the morning after we had spent all night drinking and playing board games. He threw these potatoes in the skillet with some sizzling oil and they were the most amazing things my taste buds have ever encountered. Salty and crispy heaven. His secret? Worcestershire sauce. You may take that information and do with it what you'd like, but I'll never go back.

Alright, Folks. We've reached the main event: the steak. She gives you a detailed description on how to cook the steak in the book, and I tried to get Collin to read it but I think we all know how that went. You can't tell a man to follow a recipe on how to cook a damn steak. I think all men are born with this information, actually. She gives you a little mini recipe on how to transform the steak marinade into a steak sauce, so I did that and it was easy enough.

Without steak sauce

With steak sauce

This steak was freaking delicious. Collin commented several times on how great the steak sauce was and I had absolutely zero complaints. This was amazing. Even the four year old ate it with ease - and that's a feat nowadays. I would recommend this recipe over and over again and it is just that good. I actually regret not getting 4 steaks because there is no more left. We ate it all. It's all gone and that honestly makes me a little sad. It felt like Christmas when all the presents have been opened. Mostly because it will probably be that long before I spend that kind of money on steak again. In the meantime, I still have chocolate and that puts the smile back on my face again. Anyway, food coma time. 

SS: Southern Biscuits and Gravy Casserole

Yeah, I know. I said I was back and then flaked for a month. A month I would rather not re-live, actually. I did not do much cooking and I have no excuse other than I did not want to. That being said, I flipped through and found this little gem a few weeks back and I am not one to ever turn down biscuits and gravy so: challenge accepted.

I've said before that biscuits and gravy is a delicate thing. One should not pretend to know what they're doing - I'm looking at you, Cracker Barrel - because it can ruin people's lives. Seriously, that was over two years ago and I'm still scarred. However, the author of Skinny Suppers, Brooke Griffen, is a southern girl so I had really high hopes and happily rustled up these ingredients and went to town.

First, you whisk together some eggs and cheese and milk and stick that in a pan with some turkey sausage links plopped right on top. She has you bake it for what sounds like a reasonable amount of time. This is the part where I start to get reallllly skeptical. This is what it looks like when you take it out of the oven:

The cheese melted, so that's good...but overall this was still incredibly runny.

Now, I understand that because we are adding biscuits on top that will need to bake that we do not want the egg to be fully cooked yet. However, I did not feel that they should be this runny at this stage and cooked them for about 10 minutes longer, which didn't do much but made me feel a little better. Oh, I also took the liberty of adding chopped orange, red, and yellow bell peppers because this was dinner and I felt better knowing there were veggies in it...also, I like bell peppers in my eggs for breakfast so this wasn't too far of a stretch. 

While this is "cooking" she has you make the gravy. 

I always add way more pepper than called for because I like a peppery gravy.

This went as expected and without issue. Pour it all over the under-cooked egg mixture and toss some Pilsbury biscuits on top. Now. Because I felt that the eggs did not cook enough in the beginning, I cooked these longer than the suggested time. You will also want to do this. The biscuits will get a nice golden brown on top, but the egg will also have time to cook through. 

Voila!

Because I have children, or because I have a strange appetite - I'll own it, this is not my first recipe with biscuits on top. I have had recipes where, because the biscuits are close together and on top of food, instead of straight on a baking sheet, they never cook. What you are left with is cooked biscuit tops and raw biscuit dough on the bottom. This recipe had potential for absolute disaster because of the short cook time for the eggs and the nestled biscuit dough. All factors pointed to pizza here. 

I cooked the shit out of this. I think I just about doubled the cook time and it turned out nicely. I did find a few problem areas, but nothing to write home about. In the future I will cook the eggs until firm with a little jiggle and there should be no issues. As for taste? This was freaking delish. Tweak it a bit and you've got yourself a winner. 

Holler if you want the recipe cause my kid is crying and I'm about to make bedtime half an hour earlier fa sho.

TK: Cornmeal Waffles with Strawberry Syrup

Calvin woke me up at 5 am today. He stared at me in the dark until I opened my eyes and then he complained that he was hungry. Now. Backstory: I'm not the kind of mom who wakes up whenever my kids deem it necessary, no matter what time of night it is. I trained them both early on to be good sleepers so, unless they're sick, I don't get up until at least 7:30-8:00 and that's just all there is to it. Say what you will, but it works. Now that you know my tolerance level for interrupted sleep, I sent his ass back to bed, shut the door, and let him throw a little fit until I assume he went back to sleep. I have no idea, I passed back out.

When the baby started squawking around 8:30 I rolled out of bed, in a much better mood, and decided to make a nice, filling breakfast of waffles and homemade strawberry syrup to satisfy Calvin's tummy. I had this recipe marked for a weekend when I had time and, once again, I had all the ingredients for it in the house already. Freaking score.

So, while the kids played nicely in the other room with my salad spinner, I got to work as the best mom ever.

 Strawberry syrup on point

This recipe went well. I have no complaints and it was really nice making my own syrup. I really like the fact that there were only 4 ingredients and it was probably the best syrup I've ever had.

I got 6 waffles out of the batter, instead of the promised 4, but even they went off without a hitch.

Not as fluffy as promised, but I'll get over it someday I'm sure

So we've already determined the syrup was amazing. The waffles tasted about what you would think a cornmeal waffle would taste like. Together, they melded into pure perfection. The waffles carry a muted cornbread-like flavor, and are offset so wonderfully by the sweetness of the strawberries that they compliment each other quite nicely. Andrew and I scarfed this down like rabid wolves while the starving child had two bites and asked for orange juice and Lucky Charms. 

Guess you can't win them all.

There is a waffle under there...somewhere

Strawberry Syrup

1 pound strawberries

2 to 4 tbs. sugar, depending on your taste (I used 3 and it was perfect)

1/4 cup orange juice

1/2 tsp. vanilla extract

1. Cut the stems off the strawberries and cut them into small pieces. Throw them into a small saucepan with the rest of the ingredients over medium-low heat. Stir every now and then, but let it come to a gentle simmer and cook for about 15-20 minutes. Once it thickens up a bit, turn off the heat and let it cool.

Waffles

2 cups almond or dairy free milk (I used whole cause it's what I had)

1 tsp. apple cider vinegar or lemon juice

1 1/2 cups cornmeal

1 cup whole wheat flour

2 tbs. brown sugar

1 1/2 tbs. baking powder

1/2 tsp. salt

1/8 tsp.cinnamon (I dumped a fair amount in)

2 tbs. olive oil (I swirled some in, but doubt very much that it was 2 tbs. FYI)

Cooking spray

1. Heat up your waffle iron. Mix the milk and vinegar in a small bowl and set aside.

2. Whisk together your dry ingredients. Make a crater in the center and add the milk mixture and oil. Whisk it all together until combined.

3. Coat the plates of your waffle iron with cooking spray to prevent the waffles from sticking. Pour in the batter and cook until done. Top the waffles with the syrup.

TK: Shredded Carrot and Apple Muffins

This week's grocery store trip is going to be as minimal as possible, so I did not have high hopes for any new posts. I skipped over Cravings real quick, because her shit is usually expensive and complicated and I am not about that life as of late...so I decided to check out Thug Kitchen. I was pleasantly surprised to find that most of the recipes in this book use ingredients I already have. "Kitchen Staples" if you will. I settled on this muffin recipe because I had some old, sad carrots in the fridge and an apple on the verge of suicide. Voila.

This is your standard muffin recipe. Very easy. Well, it should have been quick and easy...but the boys were playing in the backyard while I threw this together and, if you don't know already, my youngest is on a constant mission to maim and/or kill himself. I had to stop a lot to go remove him from certain death. Usually he keeps that shit to a minimum, but today there must be a full moon or something because what should have been a 15 minute prep time was easily doubled. Oh well, he's still alive so there's that.

Back to muffins. Gather, mix, scoop, bake. Done.

They do look tasty.

Close up.

Now, I did make a few adjustments to these muffins so this could be my fault, but I wasn't a huge fan of these. Andrew and Calvin ate the shit out of them, but I'll force myself to eat them for breakfast because I hate wasting food. They reminded me of a bran muffin, which I've never actually had. But with a name like that I think it's safe to assume my presumption is true. Here's the recipe anyway:

2 1/4 cups whole wheat flour

1/2 cup sugar

1 tbs. baking powder

1  1/2 tsp. ground cinnamon

1/2 tsp. salt

1 1/4 cups almond or other non dairy milk (I used whole milk because that's what I had)

1 1/2 cups grated carrots, about 3

1/3 cup grated apple, about 1

1/4 cup olive or grapeseed oil (I mostly always swap out oil for plain applesauce, which is what I did here. But you would think that would add a little flavor as opposed to the other way around...)

1 tbs. lemon juice

1 tsp. vanilla extract

1/2 cup chopped nuts (I wanted to add these, but didn't have any. They would make a big difference I think)

1. Heat the oven to 375 degrees. Grease a muffin pan or toss in some muffin liners.

2. In a bowl, whisk together the dry ingredients. In a separate bowl, mix the wet ingredients together with the apples and carrots until well combined. 

3. Pour the wet ingredients into the dry ingredients and mix until just combined. Do not overdo it or your shit will be tough as hell. Fold in the nuts if you're smart and are using them.

4. Scoop into the muffin cups and bake about 18-20 minutes, until a toothpick comes out clean. Take them out of the tin and let them cool for like 15 minutes. 

Baked Pasta Alla Norma with Mozzarella Bombs

I've been eyeing this recipe for a while. I have a strange obsession with baked pasta and it still took me this long to make because the recipe is long and requires two recipes in one. I love to cook, but sometimes I get hella lazy and don't want to do any extra work. BUTTT, after actually reading the recipe I realized this is actually not that bad. It doesn't require any marinating, and for that I thank Chrissy ten times over.

This recipe calls for eggplant. Now, eggplant always brings up a particular memory. I must have been 19 or 20 at this time. My dear friend Oscar and I went out to dinner one night and I got pasta while he ordered eggplant parmesan. I'd never in my life eaten eggplant and was very curious to know what it tasted like. Oscar, knowing that at that point in my life I had an aversion to new foods and had a hard time hiding my displeasure, gave me a look and said "You won't like it". He did this to avoid a sour look on my face and possibly a loud outburst. I'd like to thank him for knowing me so well because, a short while later, I was presented with the opportunity to try it again - and reacted as predicted.

Ever since then, I've stayed away from it. Recently, in my wise old age, I've begun to experiment with it and have had pleasurable results. The most recent experiment was eggplant pizzas which I thought were delightful....the boys not so much. Nevertheless, I proudly purchased a beautiful eggplant with high hopes for this recipe.

Now, to begin, she has you peel the eggplant. You've peeled potatoes and carrots and stuff, right? Well, this is nothing like that. You ever tried to peel an eggplant? This is not a vegetable that wishes to be peeled. The skin sticks to it like...well...skin. I started off with a potato peeler, switched to a knife, cut off a few chunks that were not skin, ditched the knife, and then finally got a rhythm with the damn potato peeler and thankfully this is only one eggplant and not a 5 lb bag.

If you ever make this recipe, I encourage you to read it like 5 times to figure out what kind of dishes you'll need and how many. The second "problem" I ran into was the amount of dishes you need for this. First, you make the sauce (her recipe calls for a saucepan, I made mine a few hours ahead of time in the crockpot - I'll post the recipe here for you so you can make that call). Then you need a pan for the eggplant and oil. Then a separate pan for the noodles to boil. Then you need a big enough dish to dump it all in that can also go in the oven. So that's...4 pots. 4 pots.  For one recipe.

But I'll be damned if it wasn't worth every single pot.

This was perfect. Oh, sweet Jesus if this didn't hit my pasta G-spot then I don't know what will. Hidden inside this (and pressed on top) are little balls of crispy on the outside, gooey on the inside mozzarella. It's just such a nice treat when paired with the noodles and fucking amazing sauce. I had a bowl of this for breakfast this morning because today is a terrible fucking day and I needed a little pick me up. I actually had my friend Emma over when this came out of the oven and she declined trying any - because clearly she's insane. I ate it though and forced myself to act like a lady and not eat seconds from the pan. 

Let me shake my head out of this pasta orgasm I've got going on and get you her sauce recipe. 

I've made this before. This sauce was featured in the Spicy Tomato Skillet Eggs with Prosciutto. Do ya'll remember that one? I made it while drunk and I may have used a crock pot then as well...Ok, well looking back at the post I make it seem like we left it simmering on the stove all night...

Perfect Tomato Sauce 

1/2 cup extra virgin olive oil

2 cups diced onion (about 2 medium)

2 tbs. finely minced garlic (about 4 cloves)

3 1/2 lbs. diced Roma tomatoes OR 1 - 28 oz. can diced tomatoes plus 1 - 28 oz. can crushed tomatoes

2 tbs. chopped fresh oregano

2 tbs. chopped fresh thyme

1 tbs. chopped fresh rosemary

1 tsp. kosher salt

1/2 tsp. pepper

You can do like I did and toss it all in a crockpot, no saute-ing required OR her way:

In a 4 quart saucepan, heat the oil over medium heat. Add the onions and cook, stirring, until translucent and beginning to turn golden, about 13 minutes. Add the garlic and cook until fragrant, 1 minute longer. Add the tomatoes, oregano, thyme, rosemary, salt and pepper. Bring to a boil, then reduce to a simmer and cook until the sauce thickens slightly, 25 to 30 minutes for fresh tomatoes, 20 to 25 minutes for canned. 

This sauce is legit, you guys. It's really freaking good either way you make it. Alright, lunch time - AKA more pasta time. 

SS: Cheesy Mexican Meatloaf

I'm just going to come right out and announce that I make an amazing meatloaf. I have a written recipe that is freaking awesome but, more often than not, I ditch the recipe and instead throw some shit together and it always turns out delicious. When I do that I almost always take the BBQ route, but I am not opposed to switching it up - hence the reason I chose this recipe for my next meatloaf night.

Now, the name Mexican meatloaf is really kind of a turnoff for me. I love Mexican food and I love meatloaf...but together? I was skeptical, but what the hell. Life's short. Let's fuck up a pound of beef.

This is pretty easy. In standard meatloaf form, you throw a bunch of shit together and press it into a loaf pan. I actually never use a loaf pan though. I usually scoop the meat into a muffin tin and make individual meatloaves. I do this for two reasons: portion control and it takes about 20-25 minutes to cook through as opposed to over an hour. I have zero patience, especially when I'm hungry...though I'm sure most of you know that already...

Really the only problem I had with this recipe was what the hell to pair it with. Do I make rice? Mashed potatoes? What the hell goes with Mexican meatloaf??? After about fifteen minutes of asking Calvin and fifteen minutes of hearing his three year old voice tell me he really doesn't care, I gave up, said fuck it, and cut up some damn strawberries. There. Side done.

A nice, cheesy aerial view for ya'll

I tried to get a good side view of the layers of meat and cheese. Tried.

The verdict: This wasn't bad at all. I did put ketchup on mine because I think that ketchup makes every kind of meatloaf taste better, but Andrew ate his rather quickly and Calvin only kind of complained. Success. 

Cheesy Mexican Meatloaf

I don't really want to type out the nutrition info, but it's got 357 calories for 1 slice. Slice the damn loaf into 6 slices. 

1 1/2 lbs. ground beef

1 cup black beans, drained and rinsed

1 - 7 oz. can fiesta corn, drained - I used frozen cause I didn't have this

1 - 4.5 oz. can chopped green chilies - undrained

1 - 1 oz. packet low sodium taco seasoning

2 egg whites, beaten - yeah I did not beat those two little egg whites, sorry

1/2 cup plain bread crumbs 

1 cup shredded Mexican blend cheese 

1/2 cup medium tomato salsa  - I used what I had. 

1 tbs. brown sugar

12 medium tomato, diced

2 jalapeno peppers, sliced

1) Preheat the oven to 375 degrees. Spray a 9-inch loaf pan with cooking spray.

2) In a bowl, combine the beef, beans, corn, green chilies taco seasoning, egg whites and bread crumbs. Mix it all together.

3) Place half the beef mixture in the bottom of your loaf pan. Spread 1/2 cup cheese on top. Top that with the other half of your beef mixture. Bake for 1 hour.

4) In the meantime, mix together your salsa and brown sugar. Once the meatloaf has baked for one hour, spread the salsa mix on top and sprinkle the remaining cheese on top of that. Bake for an additional 10 minutes. 

5) Let the meatloaf rest for 5 minutes before cutting. 

6) Garnish with the tomatoes and jalapenos. I did not do this because I was giving it to my kids, but I'm sure the extra kick would have been legit.